Talking Tesco…

Talking of Tesco, that is, not a talking Tesco, which would be one step too far towards a dystopian future I don’t want to end up in (*).

But talking of Tesco, and their insistence on opening stupid little metro or express stores on every street corner, rather than (what they were good at) larger supermarkets, or even hypermarkets (man there are some proper big Gypermarkets here: in Russia ‘H’ often becomes ‘G’ at the start of a word, in case you’ve just joined)… I’m afraid Saint Pete got you beat!

IMG_0620Allow me to introduce the Micro Market!

Awwwwww, isn’t it sweet?

You even get contact numbers for Sabina, Dasha and Nastia (Anastasia), although sadly Vika’s number is obscured in this shot. (and it seems Sabina is available 24 hours… doesn’t the girl ever sleep?)

This picture was taken back in February, but could just as easily been last week, as I returned from a rapidly melting Sochi to snow here. This week we have sunshine again though, which is nice.

Anyway, the reason I didn’t post this earlier is because I wanted to go back and check inside. Basically I wanted there to be a better range in there than there is in a small Tesco (which I can always rely on to not have the one essential ingredient I need… even if they usually stock it), so that I could report back just how badly Tesco do small retail outlets.

Unfortunately by the time I went back it was gone!

Now these are uncertain times and you may point out that businesses close all the time, but that’s not what I mean… I mean the whole Micro Market was gone. No building, and no sign that anything had ever been there. At first I thought I was in the wrong place and started checking around nearby (behind bins, under newspapers and such), but the shop in the background was still there (ТВОЙ ДЕНЬГИ – Tvoi Dyengi – Your Money), and Sabina was still available.

I wish I had a picture for you to illustrate just how gone it was, but sadly my phone battery was just as gone, and now my business for being in that area is also gone. And I’m hardly gonna take a special trip back out there just to get a picture, as it’s miles away?

I’m not sure who took it, but when my friend got her phone stolen in Kupchino (it’s at the end of one of the Metro lines. you can imagine what it’s like), some local gangsters came out of the woodwork some upstanding members of the community returned it when she offered a reward, so if the previous owner wants it back that may be the way to go.

And if Tesco start opening shops so annoyingly small then let me know and I’ll send the Kupchino boys over to disappear them too.

* Although since they got rid of the human staff and made us do the cashiers job ourselves…
[do we get paid for this? are we supposedly quicker at it than someone who does it all day? okay, i’ll admit that some of the muppets they employ are neither use nor ornament, but in general surely???… where is the benefit to the customer? maybe it’s aimed at people who can’t cope with non-Facebook friends or being polite to a stranger for a minute? in which case Tesco appear to think that the vast majority of their customers have such issues.]
…um, I guess that we live in that future now.

“Please insert your card into the chip and pin device”
“Please enter your PIN”
“Your card has been declined, you might prefer shopping in Lidl”

“Okay, no need to shout”

When you talk back to the machine they have won!

About Anglichanin

Anglichanin is a pen name. It is the name I have called my pen. For more useful information please read 'About the Author'.
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